Now Sriracha Is Ordered To Stop Production. Why Does God Hate Us?

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Attention California State Department Of Health, you just made the list. That being the list of things intentionally trying to ruin my life, which includes AT&T customer service, buffering, and tantalizing football teasers.

So, now after having to deal with whining sackless Irwindale residents, Huy Fong Foods and their holy Sriracha sauce have to deal with another set of assholes, the aforementioned Cali. Board of Health.

Without warning, bureaucratic monsters are halting shipment for 30 days to “ensure an effective treatment of microorganisms a present in the product”. That means no new rooster sauce will be on shelves until mid-January.

This sounds like Grade-A horseshit and it appears as if some complaining neighbors complained to the right public officials. Now the world waits on pins and needles for the observation of microorganisms and the fate of our heavenly daily gravy.

This holiday season don’t forget about the ones you love. I’ll be praying for you Huy Fong. There’s only one list you’re on: the list of things enhancing my life.

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